The following is a sampling of the types of corrections you might find in my edits.
1. The study estimated the incidence of follicular lymphoma in migrant workers in the United States. [This sentence may sound okay to most, but the word incidence is used incorrectly. Incidence is the number of new cases that occur over time and is usually expressed with a percentage of individuals or a rate. The word prevalence is the correct choice. Prevalence is the total number of persons with the disease at any given time. Replace incidence with prevalence.]
2. Ten million Americans experience Noise-Induced Hearing Loss (NIHL), which the EPA warns is a contributing factor in high blood pressure and chronic tinnitus. [Easy catch here: lower case n/i/h/l because this is a condition and not a proper name.]
3. The lowest percent of reported symptoms occurred in patients treated with intravenous t-PA. [Percent is used incorrectly. Percent should be used with a specific number. Replace with percentage.]
4. In our cardiac study of 300 patients, we excluded patients who suffered from diabetes. [Suffered? For medical copy, AMA style does not recommend using emotional terms to describe people with diseases. Delete -who suffered from. Replace using the word -with.]
5. The symptomatology of the patients decreased by 22% in Group B. [I don’t think so. Terms with the ending -ology mean the science of or study of. Replace symptomatology with symptoms.]
6. Some important vitamins found in vegetables are: vitamin A, thiamin, and vitamin C. [This wrong use of the colon is one I see a lot. We do not separate a verb (or preposition) from its object. Delete colon.]
7. When Christa set the vase on the glass-topped table, it broke. [Pronoun confusion. What broke? The vase or the glass top? Guess I’d have to query the author on that one.]
8. Correcting the errors, the copy improved delightfully. [Oh no, a dangling participle. Rewrite as, Correcting the errors, Paula delightfully improved the copy.]